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I love 1 star reviews.  No, I don’t love getting them, I love reading them.  I can’t help myself.  I’ll go to browse some possible book selections, and I just have to see what those 1 star (and sometimes 2 star) comments are all about.  Sometimes they give me insight into what went wrong in a novel.  There are articulate, well written 1 star reviews that clearly point out flaws, plot holes, abysmal style, absolute lack of proofreading.  Then there are the scathing rants.  It’s the rants I love the best.  More fun than late night TV and a barrel of monkeys in a giant blender.  Some of the most entertaining to date:

  • The erotica novel reader who summed up her hatred of a book as “smut

Comments(6)

  1. A Prius?! And I thought a Volt was bad. Why the heck wasn’t he magically flying everywhere? No CO2 problem, and conserves our precious fossil fuels. I did read a vampire erotica/romance where the vamp insisted his human blood source eat all organic, etc. But it was scary and controlling, more concern about how her blood tasted then her overall health. Kind of like raising veal.

    I’ve posted only 1 two star review, and I thought I was very kind. I’ve even put some critical comments in three and four star reviews. I just can’t tempt fate any further though, especially since I’m not a big seller and have only a handful of reviews.

    It’s a shame that reviewers can’t be honest without all the nutjobs coming out of the woodwork.

  2. Actually, it was even worse. It was a Prius. There was just no way I could consider an immortal warrior who drinks blood as being a badass if he’s driving a Prius of all things. Oh, the image of that! Almost the whole book the author managed to sneak in something about healthy living and environmental concerns. It just wasn’t something I felt appropriate for a vampire book.

    It can be scary posting critical reviews, so I don’t write them unless I feel very strongly about the book and willing to take the heat. I once got attacked for a three star review I wrote that was mostly positive. The only bad thing I said was I didn’t like the heroine (because all she did was brag about how tough she was and how big her breasts were), but otherwise I said the story and side characters were good. The author and her friends still got upset and went on the attack. Sad, since it was probably the nicest critical review I ever wrote. More reviews came in later from other readers complaining of the exact same things I had, but in much worse terms. Mine probably didn’t seem so bad after that. I still took a hit with some neg votes, but plenty of pos votes came in from others who agreed to make up for it. Still, I hate those negs because they always hit my Amazon reviewer ranking hard.

  3. Brita Fang Filters! I can’t imagine a dangerous, sexy vampire driving a Chevy Volt and dragging his recycle tub to the curb every other Wednesday. Although, that might make for a good parody, or paranormal humor.

    I’ve started quite a few books that would have received 1 star reviews, but never finished them. I also get paranoid about putting one and two star reviews when I’ve got books of my own on the market. There are just too many psychos in the world! Still, I’ll *like* a poor review if I think it’s on the mark.

  4. I LOL at the socks comment. I can totally identify!
    I think a lot of people read Fifty Shades just to be able to join in on the rants of how terrible it was. And yes, I was one of those people 😉

    • sock bun

    • 11 years ago

    I love 1 star reviews! I have to confess that sometimes I’ll even buy a book based on the 1 star reviews because I want to experience just how bad it is.

    — I find almost nothing to identify with in this book. I feel sorry for anyone whose life is as meaningless as that described in this “novel.”

    — This was the first book I seriously considered not finishing; having given up any thought that the author had something to say to me.

    — “Literary memoirs” ought to amount to more than just gossip. The author should use more of her imagination in telling her story without victimizing the very community she gets her source material and sustenance from.

    — I feel stupid for reading this book and wish I had spent that ten bucks on socks.

    — I want to give this book to someone I hate and tell them it’s awesome. That’s how bad it is.

    — I am disappointed with myself that I read this travesty in its entirety.

  5. This is my favorite one star review. It was totally accurate for the book, but far funnier than I could have put such an awful story. I go back and read it whenever I need a good laugh.

    http://www.amazon.com/review/R2PT4UY4QVZ2MG/ref=cm_cr_rdp_perm?ie=UTF8&ASIN=1453780653&linkCode=&nodeID=&tag=

    If a book is bad enough to warrant a one star, I usually don’t get far enough into it to bother writing one. I have posted a few two-stars, though. This is my most popular one that I still get nice comments on a year and a half later:

    http://www.amazon.com/review/RNNR9DP56A71X/ref=cm_cr_rdp_perm

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